Let the truth come out...

Haven't blogged in a while. Sorry for that. You know when you have absolutely nothing to do, but you feel like doing absolutely nothing? That has been me for the past 3 weeks --at the very least. Nevertheless, I have to voice something: my change of self.
Sophomore year will mean a new me. There are many qualities of mine that I love, but then there are those which I hate.
I certainly don't like the fact that I easily choke when talking to somebody. I become a very boring person for the sole fear of what people are going to think of me. I am sick of that. Let people think whatever they want about me, and if they don't like it, they can go talk to somebody else and ignore me! Still, all this I am writing is easier said than done, but I promise to try as hard as I can to change this part of my personality.
Another thing I wish to change, is my constant search for love. Everything comes at its own time, and so will love. I need to stop looking frantically for somebody; stop thinking that every guy I meet must automatically become a prospective boyfriend. As I have often been told, when you least expect it, thats when it happens. So I guess in a complicated way, by letting go of the need to find somebody, I am probably making it easier to eventually find somebody (read it twice and then you'll understand).
On top of those changes, I plan on trying to get my life in order. I feel like I am straying from my goals and morals. For this reason I must focus on what I want and plan to live in a way that won't harm my future.
I know this is sounding very philosophical and what not, but this vent is much needed. I need somebody to talk to, and due to the absence of one of the most important people in my life, Amanda, I must vent through my blog (and possibly receive suggestions or solutions for my issues).
On the brighter side, I will soon be living on my own --with Amanda as my apt. mate--, and studying my ass off in order to complete the two majors I am routing for: journalism and business. I will apply for another job, even if it means I will have less free time on my hands, because I have proved that me and leisure are not always very good friends.
I guess thats it for now, and I will soon blog a less intense post.